Iranian Football Federation is something of a cross between the Three Stooges and the Keystone Cops! Remember those silent clips where the guys were running all over the place in a completing chaotic scene? Well that is how the IRIFF is run! Then comes Mohammad Aliabadi, one of Ahmadinejad’s VPs who is also in charge of the National Physical Education Organization (NPEO) that oversees the football federation (don’t believe for a second that football federation is an independent entity!). He plays the role of Moe! Someone in the IRIFF says something stupid and Aliabadi comes out slapping their faces, pulling their nose, and twisting their ears!

I have not figured out what role the IRIFF Chief Ali Kaffashian plays yet, although he seems to be one of Moe’s favorite targets! The guy seems to be so out of touch with what is going on under his nose! Just the other day the news leaked that a few top flight coaches in Iran were going to be indefinitely banned from football because of corruption allegations. Note, I said “allegations”; nothing has been proven yet!

Today Kaffashian came out and denied all of this. He said that these are all baseless allegations and no investigation has been done to prove any of them. When a reporter pointed out that according to Kaffashian’s own deputies there has been an investigation on this matter, he response was that he had been out sick and if there was anything done during his recovery period, he wouldn’t know!!

What a mess!

Not that I am kicking a gift horse in the mouth, but are we talking about our Football Association?! The same Association that does not know its left from its right?

When I heard this I wondered what the AFC criteria for being the best in Asia were so I did a little bit of research and here is what I found out.  According to the AFC official website:

The AFC Association of the Year award is given to a Member Association in recognition of its exceptional contribution to the development and promotion of the game within their country particularly in the areas of (but not limited to):

– Grassroots and youth development
– Clubs and national league development
– Participation in continental and world-wide competition
– Professionalisation of its administration and governance

Folks, I can tell you with certain degree of certainty that this could only mean one of the following three:

1- The judges were drunk out of their minds!
2- Somebody stuffed the judges’ pockets with something green!
3- The rest of the AFC Associations are in ruins!

I was flabbergasted when I heard the news. I thought for sure either Korea Republic or Japan Associations were more deserving, but who am I to say that our football federation has got its head up its rear end. Things are so bad that IRIFF could be a good case study for how not to do things.

Our stadiums are in ruin, our clubs are struggling financially and organizationally, we do not have a true professionalism, corruption is suffocating the game, lack of adequate sports medicine is taking a toll on our young players, and we desperately need well trained coaches and physical trainers. And yet, we are the Association of the Year!

No wonder Asian football is lagging the rest of the world by such long distance!

That all sounds good, but the trouble is that Borhani is known to Iranian football fans more for his sometimes fantastic misses than hits!

Borhani came on the Iranian football seen as a speedy young striker with a world of potential. Many thought that he would replace Ali Daei as the top striker in Iran, but wrong they were! Borhani seemed to always find a way to miss. Soon he became the butt of the Iranian football fans’ jokes.

Click here for a few of Arash Borhani’s better misses.

Well, for the sake of the Borhani, Esteghlal FC, Team Melli, and their fans, I hope Borhani’s recently discovered scoring touch is not a fluke, but I just have this inkling!

There is a popular football news program on Iranian TV called “90”. In a recent program Adel Ferdowsipour, the anchor, showed a photo of a municipal football field in one of the small towns in south/central Iran.  In the photo there was a sheep herd having a blast munching on the grass field!

Ferdowsipour poked fun at the photo and then went on to criticize the officials for their apparent lack of concern for the facilities.

The top local official in charge of the office of National Physical Education Organization, Mr. Hajipour, took exception with Ferdowsipour’s comments and accused him of unfairly poking fun at not only the officials but the entire township, and demanded an apology.

Mr. Hajipour told reporters that the sheep herd’s presence on the field was a part of a preplanned maintenance arrangement!

“Studies have shown that regular presence of sheep can improve the quality of the pitch because they provide natural fertilizer”, said Mr. Hajipour. “Additionally, the sheep trim the grass better than most mechanical devices that tend to burn the top portion of the blades of the grass as they cut them.”

He went on to suggest that their approach was more environmentally friendly and more cost effective because no fossil fuel is required for trimming the pitch!

According to Mr. Hajipour the field hosts up to four matches per week and yet it was recently rated as one of the top five pitches in the nation!

Pay attention Old Trafford, Bernabeu, Camp Nou, and San Siro managers! Here is your chance to go green, save money, and improve your pitch condition all at the same time.

First, there was former Team Melli coach Mohammad Mayelikohan and Perspolis coach Afshin Ghotbi. Not a very popular, but outspoken, person, Mayelikohan had publicly criticized Ghotbi for everything from his on field tactics to his marital situation. Ghotbi had refused to hit back as hard, but had pointed to Mayelikohan’s unsuccessful coaching history in recent years.

Mayelikohan showed up at a Perspolis training session the other day and the two issued a joint statement after kissing and making up!

Not wanting to be outdone, Team Melli coach Ali Daei and Esteghlal head coach Amir Ghalehnoei did the same on the day of Team Melli and DPR Korea encounter a couple of weeks ago. On the same day, by the way, many former coaches and football personalities who had previously been unkind to each other showed up for the game and all sat peacefully and happily in the same section. A few were even caught on camera speaking to each other!!

Then today, Ali Daei paid a surprise visit to Perspolis locker room at the half of their match against Bargh and made it all good between him and former Team Melli midfielder Ali Karimi.

Ghotbi, who is not in the best of terms with Daei, was not too happy about the visit claiming that the visit could have distracted Karimi from the game.

Karimi, for his part, thanked Daei for being gracious, but stated that the visit does not change his mind regarding his international retirement. In other words, he will not play for Daei.

It remains to be seen if the visit did any good for the Ghotbi / Daei relationship.

It’ll be interesting to see for how long these truces will last. Based on my experience with Iranian football, two weeks would be very optimistic!

The rookie head coach of Zob Ahan of Isfahan Mansour Ebrahimzadeh is proving himself to be quite a find these days. Mansourzadeh was the assistant coach of Sephan FC also of Isfahan for a few years. He then became the assistant coach of the national team for a few months just before Ali Daei took over. Once Daei came on board he brought along his own crew leaving Mansourzadeh unemployed.

Being a native of Isfahan, he eventually returned home to take the top job at the other big Isfahan club Zob Ahan.

Zob Ahan has been one of the mosre consistent sides in the Iranian football since the inception of the Iranian Professional League in 2001, along the way the Isfahan boys have won one Hazfi Cup and appeared in the AFC Champions League once.

After 11 Rounds this season, Zob Ahan is comfortably sitting at the pole position and shows no sign of slowing down; to the contrary they seem to be beginning to believe in themselves.

Click here to view photo gallery of Zob Ahan v Moghavemat:

Photo Gallery I

Photo Gallery II

No one expects the unglamorous Zob Ahan to win the title this year, but should they finish amongst top four and win a spot in next year’s AFC Champions League, Ebrahimzadeh must be given the lion’s share of the credit.

The Iranian-American Head Coach of Perspolis FC has been getting some heat, although not much, from pundits who do not feel he is doing a good job with the club. Last year Ghotbi led the Perspolis to its first title in many years, but ten games into this season the team is still struggling to find its own identity.

The problem seems to be the back line. The team has scored 18 goals, which is respectable, but they have also allowed 15, which is not!

On Wednesday Perspolis that is 6th in the table will meet the 3rd place Bargh of Shiraz. The Shiraz boys have scored 17 and allowed only 7 goals, and have been consistently competitive all season.

The result of this match will speak loudly about the character of Perspolis as a team, and it may determine the future of Ghotbi at its helm.

The defeat may be the beginning of the end for Saipa’s German coach Pierre Littbarski. Iranian club presidents do not take kindly to major butt kickings, especially in the hands of foreign clubs.

Congratulations Kuruvchi, better luck next time Saipa!

Rivaldo came to town the other day! The same Rivaldo who won the World Cup with Brazil in 2002!

The Brazilian had signed a contract with Uzbek side Kuruvchi and they were in Tehran for the away leg of their AFC Champions League match against Saipa FC coached by former German international Pierre Litbarski.

Rivaldo did well as expected. The man may be older now, but he is still fun to watch.

The match ended a 2-2 draw. Saipa have a steep hill to climb.

Afshin Ghotbi achieved the goal that he set for himself from the first day he took the job at Perspolis FC. The forty something Iranian-American had no idea that he was stepping into a snake pit that has devoured more experience coaches throughout its history. At times he so puzzled by what was happening in his own clubhouse that he was lost for words to describe it, but never he even considered lowering the bar and giving in to the idea that he may not be able to win the league with this team in this year.

What transpired on Saturday in Tehran’s Azadi stadium was nothing short of a cardiac ending. Perspolis took the lead early, then gave it up, but then on the last minute of the injury time pulled off a winner.

The victory not only sent 100,000 Perspolis fans in the stadium into frenzy, but it also drove the fans around the country into the streets waving anything red they could find.

This victory is good for Ghotbi, good, for the club, good for the fans, and even good for the country. The question now is whether Ghotbi will stay for another year, or will he leave for Korea where his wife is from. He is regarded very highly there and the chances are he could have the top job with one of the top flight clubs if he chooses to do so.

My recommendation to him, pack it up and leave! Iranian football is notorious for turning on its heroes. The phrase “what have you done for me lately” takes on a literal meaning in the IPL.